After the Fire
by The Lonely Serenade
Summary: Sometimes, just being happy is enough. At least, it is to Natsume. Canon/Slight AU. NaMi.


**After the Fire**

_Written by The Lonely Serenade_

Disclaimer: I don't own Gakuen Alice.

_After the fire is over  
After the ashes cool  
After the smoke has blown away  
I will be here for you_

—_After the Fire by Amy Grant_

"Are you trying to kill me?"

The jet-black haired man voiced in a low tone as he watched the brunette strutted across the field, all barefooted and fearless, her hazel eyes glimmered with soft tints of contentment under the mellifluous moonlight. She seemed to be ignorant of his presence until she directed her gaze upon him and gave him a beatific smile, her expression so tender and wistful that when he saw her walking towards him and placed her hands on his chest, he couldn't help but bring her into an embrace.

"Why did you leave?" he asked, sounding imperceptibly miffed.

"Are you angry?"

He sighed. "No, I'm just…..never mind." He looked straight into her eyes and spoke, "Why did you leave?"

"Because I felt like going here."

The man frowned in discord and tightened the woman into his arms. "That's the stupidest reason I've ever heard from you today."

She laughed lightly. "What do you mean by today?"

A little smirk was carved on the man's handsome face, his crimson eyes shone with amusement. "You've thrown other sentences that were much more unreasonable in the past ten years than the one you were giving me just now."

The brown-haired woman huffed and punched the man's chest lightly. "Yeah right, like you're one to talk."

He looked at her with such tender lights in his eyes—as if they finally found what they had been pining all this time—and the corners of his mouth tilted a bit to form a small, unveiled smile. And at that moment—just at that particular moment—he finally realized how lucky he was to have survived all of the crazy and life-threatening ordeals they were all put into before. And at that moment, like in a blink of an eye, when he pulled back and stroked her cold cheeks with his hands, he finally realized just how fortunate he was to have her by his side, radiating that shade of light that was so _her_. She took his unexpected gesture of affection with surprise, but then beamed a warm smile at him and put her hand to cover his with her small one.

"Is there something wrong, Natsume?"

The black-haired man moved forward again and breathed in her scent of fresh daisies. "Nothing…..I'm just…..happy."

"Happy?" he saw her furrowing her brows in confusion while tilting her head to the side, "Just that? Happy? No other words to express your emotions? I mean, I'm not as smart as you are—hey, don't smirk at me like that! Anyway, it may sound a bit off the topic—but even I can come up with other words that are more….profound?"

Natsume snorted. "Profound. Right."

She rolled her eyes. "I don't need you to be sarcastic Natsume, it's the truth. I can express what I'm feeling right now with lots of other words: Content, blissful, ecstatic, thrilled, elated, and many other that I can't come up with. They're practically mixing—no, _welling_ up the insides of my heart right now."

"I'm surprised that you are knowledgeable of such words."

Mikan puffed her cheeks in annoyance before releasing the breath that she was holding in a loud sigh. "You know what, I get the feeling you're just trying to avoid what I'm actually asking you. You do that all the time."

He moved apart, creating a distance between them, before settling down on the cool grass near the spot where she was standing. "And you know that because…?"

"Because I'm your lover, of course."

Her unabashed declaration, paired with the cheeky grin that she was giving him, threw him off for a second; but then something inside him churned uncontrollably and he grasped the verity that he just couldn't win against her. Even if the person herself didn't know about this, but if somebody asked who wore the pants in their relationship, it would most definitely be her.

The bright and loving Mikan Sakura.

"You should choose your words carefully next time, or I will take advantage of what you're saying in the most daunting way that you can't possibly think of."

"Heh, your threatening words don't work on me, Natsume. Whatever tricks you pull out of your sleeves, I can handle it."

Natsume resisted the urge to sigh at her stupidity or chuckle at that endearing side of hers. "Stupid Mikan."

"What was that?"

"Nothing," he muttered.

"Fine, since I know you're as stubborn as a bull once you've decided on something, I'm not going to push you. I'm not even _that_ interested."

He looked at her. "Really."

"Yeah, really."

"Huh."

"Uh-huh."

"I see."

"Yeah."

"Is that so."

"Y-yeah..."

"Oh."

"Argh, fine, I admit it, I _am_ curious. Just stop your stupid game of….whatever game you're playing right now. It makes me realize that my skill in interjections is below yours…..among other things."

Natsume let out a deep rumble of laugh from his chest, and the sound of it sent waves of pleasure to her conscience. She took a peek from the corner of her eyes and saw him staring at her with such unfettering intensity. Embarrassed, she wiped her head to the other side and took a seat beside him silently, her ears turning a shade of red that didn't go unnoticed by his eyes.

"Fine, how about we come up with an agreement," he proposed, suddenly breaking the silence.

His statement poked her interest. "What kind of agreement?"

"You're going to tell me why you left me—"

"But—"

"All alone in the hotel room—"

"Hey!—"

"Right after our first night as a married couple," Natsume finished.

Mikan's cheeks were on fire and she was well aware of how her face looked like a fresh tomato right now. "Fine, but you're going to tell me why, after our first night as a married couple, the only word that you can give me is _happy_."

"Fine."

"Fine."

"Well, go on. I created the idea, so I demand you to go first."

"What? That's _so_ not fair—!"

"Of course it is fair."

Mikan clicked her tongue and folded her arms. "Alright. But, just," she hesitated for a while, before darting her hazel eyes to his, "Don't judge me because of this, Natsume. I want you to listen to me first before you spurt out any comments."

His eyes softened at the sound of her wavering voice, and he nodded in apprehension.

"I apologize for leaving you like that. I know that the act must have hurt both your pride and feelings, but I just needed time to think for myself. To me, last night was the best thing that I've ever experienced in my whole life. And I was just so overwhelmed by all of it, to be able to feel the warmth of your body laying next to me in the morning, to have your arm enclosed me in a protective hold, I love every moment of it. But at the same time, I just can't ignore the feeling of guilt that gnawed my heart every time I feel this happiness.

"I feel like it's too good to be true, you know. I'm not even an Alice anymore, and you're Natsume Hyuuga—the beautiful, genius fire caster that saved Alice Academy from its destruction. I actually think that I'm not worthy of you. You're so brave, and kind, and even if you are a terrible pervert sometimes, you are the most wonderful person I've ever known. It's so painful to feel the distance the pulls us even when we're this close."

Natsume closed his eyes. "You're pressured."

She gave him a tight smile. "Yes."

He looked at her with an expression that urged her to continue.

"Some part of me also feels guilty for actualizing this happiness that I've always dreamed with my best friend; the happiness that I used to share with her, with _Hotaru_. Natsume, I can't help but feeling guilty for all these things that I'm feeling. She saved me, and I abandoned her all alone in that freezing night. We can't even do a proper burial for her. She's Hotaru, Natsume. She's my best friend. She's the one who used to scold me for my clumsiness and the one who accompanied me through everything. And now she's gone. She had done so much for me but all that I could give her was pain. I don't want to be happy. Not if it was because of her suffering."

"But she loved you, Mikan."

She snapped. "How did _you_ know? You _don't_ know Hotaru. She could be cursing me from the heavens for all the situations that I've made her gone through!"

Natsume grabbed her chin and forced her to look into his eyes. "I know because I love you. _We_ love you. I understand why she chose to save you. That's because she cherished you. So much that even I know you hold a large portion of her heart. Maybe as much as Ruka. And I don't care if you're not an Alice, you're still _Mikan_. The stupid idiot who can't tell the difference between a saint and a lecher."

Her breath was shaky and she was in the verge of crying. "But it's just so sad, Natsume. I tried to be strong. It has been a long time since she was gone, but why did I have to feel this way right now of all time?"

Natsume felt his heart tightened at her fragile countenance, and pulled her small figure into an embrace. "You _are_ strong, Mikan, even more than I am. But sometimes, it's okay not to be strong, to cry and to show your weakness, you know? That's why I'm here for you. For better or for worse, until death do us apart, remember?"

She released a wavering laugh. "You're such a dork, Natsume."

He scoffed good-naturedly and ruffled her hair. "Speak for yourself, idiot."

"Don't call me an idiot."

"Fine then, little girl."

"Don't call me that too!"

"Okay, Mikan," he spoke in a warm tone, closing her tighter to him. "Now do you want to know why I express my feelings with only the word, _'happy'_?"

She looked up from his chest and stared at him inquisitively.

Natsume closed his eyes for a while before breathed in the crisp air of the night and gazed at the dark, twinkling sky, "Since the war had started, I always felt wary of the remaining time that we could spend together because tomorrow, without both of us knowing anything, _I_ could get killed. _You_ could get killed. And the future didn't seem to hold any meaning to me at that time. So when we're finally here, right now, I can't dare to feel anything more than being happy. After the gruesome war that we had gone through, we're still at each other's side, and that's enough. Being happy is enough for me."

Mikan sniffed loudly and cried into his chest. "You stupid jerk, stop making me cry."

He rolled his eyes. "Why _are_ you crying? You're so sappy."

"Am not!"

"Whatever."

Mikan rubbed her red eyes and tried to stop her outburst, all the while sniffling like a little kid. Natsume wanted to laugh at her expression, but all of a sudden she tugged on his shirt and closed the distance between them, pressing her salty, wet lips to his cold ones.

All of the unsettling feelings that were bottled inside him vanished like they were never there before, but just before he replied to her sweet kiss; she had pulled them apart with a steaming face and a hazed gaze.

"Thank you for understanding, Natsume. And I'm sorry for before," she spoke, her face was facing the grass below so he couldn't see her expression well, but he could tell from her red ears that she was still blushing like a little kitty, "Thank you for feeling happy. Thank you for deciding to spend the rest of your life with me."

His eyes darkened like a ruby, and he brought his lips to her ears, pressing soft kisses before muttering, "You're welcome, Mikan."

Even after everything, their proximity sent Mikan's heart hampering, but then she relaxed herself into his embrace and adjusted her head on the crook his neck. Just as she was about to fall asleep from the cool wisp of the breeze, a small, bright glow caught her eyes. From between the tall grasses there was a spark flying, illuminating the dark night with its brightness.

"Firefly," she whispered, still in awe by its beautiful light.

"Hotaru."

"What?" she asked absent-mindedly, reaching out her arms to catch it in her palm, but failed to do so.

"Let's name our daughter Hotaru." Natsume repeated, eyes transfixed to her surprised face.

She felt herself parting her mouth like a fool, before closing them slowly and cleared her throat when she saw Natsume's amused expression. "Yeah, it would be nice….but wait. How did you know we're going to have a daughter? We could have a son too, you know."

"Then give the name to our son's little sister."

"Wait, what? How did you know that he's going to have a little sister? And what if we don't get a little sister for our eldest son?"

Natsume smirked and whispered in her ears, "Then I guess, we'll just have to keep trying."

.

.

.

"_I will be here for you, Mikan." —Hotaru._

.

.

.

END.

A/N: Oh. My. God. I can't believe I ended it like that. I was trying to make it more dramatic, with an angsty end, but I just couldn't do it. I'm such a sap. And I'm posting a story in the middle of my final exam, which is why my writings are probably so, very rusty—I mean, it sure has been a long time since I last wrote, this April if I'm not wrong—and grammatical errors are prone to show somewhere. I have the feeling that the pace is too fast, but I will be very busy after this so I will alter it a bit after I'm _free_. But anyway, I miss writing for this couple, so yeah…..there you go. Urgh, the pressure from school is taking its toll on me and I hope I can finish the first term peacefully.

As usual, constructive criticisms are welcomed, and reviews regarding your opinion are highly appreciated.

Best of luck to all of you, and thank you for reading.

Sincerely yours,

_The Lonely Serenade. _


End file.
